It’s ok to FEEL(period).
Today I had a bit of a breakthrough, actually, I’d have to say I’ve been having a lot of those lately. I feel like self-growth will never stop. Maybe that’s a good thing, I don’t know. But I do know I’m liking myself more and more these, or at least not battling myself so much :-)
So today something upset me. And in my old way of being, I would push it away, because I knew it wasn’t a GOOD way to feel. I was comparing myself to others, judging what they had that I didn’t and went into a bit of a state of victimhood. Having done so much self-work, read so many books on how to be more mindful, grateful….etc. I know Victimhood is considered BAD. Plus all the books say… what we focus on we attract more of.
But what if everything isn’t always defined by good and bad, black and white. What if there is a middle ground. I recently started investigating this and also thanks to the refresher of the “Four Agreements”. We can be so conditioned to this way of thinking. Thankfully, we can change our conditioning. So I have been thinking what if I just accepted how I felt, which was further strengthened by my reiki teacher’s post... “what you resist, persists”.
When I look back It’s so true. When I have tried to deny the love that I felt towards someone, it didn’t just go away. Nor did the feeling of disappointment because I couldn’t change my mom. Or today, the feeling of envy, It never just goes away, so there must be another way. Today I decided it was ok to feel both. It was ok to feel envious and grateful. To just feel, without feeling guilty about what I was feeling.
It was amazing how quickly I snapped back to my positive, loving, caring self, as soon as I gave myself permission to feel whatever I felt.
I hope we can all find a little more softness towards ourselves. Especially right now with all that, we are going through. I thought I would post about this today because I often keep these realizations that help soothe me, to myself. But like my Reiki teachers post, maybe it’s exactly what someone else needed to hear.
Besides, I hope its a nice reminder to know that intrinsically we are good. We want good for others, and it is 100% ok to feel off your center at times.